Awareness / Remembering Who You Really Are / Self-Concept / Self-Love

Self Love – The Understanding Of Who You Really Are

Self love is being love

Before I knew about Neville and his teachings, there was a time in my life when I experienced a lot of emotional pain. I had no idea how to heal myself, nor how to overcome this, and it was overwhelming. But then something happened in a moment of stillness, and all of my thoughts and all the pain disappeared into nothing but clarity. I felt the whole universe and the eternity inside of myself and it was the answer to every question I ever asked. It was pure love.

And when you discover the true God, you will find that He is all within your own wonderful being as your own wonderful human imagination.

Neville Goddard – The Secret Of Imagining

Neville tells us that our imagination is God, and with his teachings I finally understood what I experienced years ago – I felt the source for everything within myself. I felt that there is nothing but love and every reason for grief, sorrow and loss is an illusion. I felt who I really am.

To me, this state of pure clarity is self love. When I am aware of who I am, I also understand what others are and so there is nothing but love for me and them. It is bliss and calmness, it feels secure and fulfilling. With this feeling comes forgiveness, empathy and gentleness, since there is no reason to not be gentle with yourself and others.

Self love – action and reaction

Self love is not something you do, but what you are. It doesn’t really matter what you do to love yourself, as long as you do everything from that state of being love.

Put yourself into that state of your highest good, the ideal you have about yourself, and be the person you want to be right now. Let any action and thought follow from that state. How would you treat yourself and others as this person? What self talk would you have as this beautiful, wonderful person you are already? What impulses, what goals and what image of your future do you have while feeling the infinity within your heart? How would you treat the world outside of your imagination while knowing, your imagination is God?

You might want to meditate to sink more into that feeling to enjoy it. You might want to do a workout or cook a healthy meal to honor your body, or it might be the desire to hug someone you love. It can be a nap or a shopping tour to gift yourself or others. You might want to reject anything that does not fit your ideal. You might want to dance, to cry, to paint or simply eat a piece of chocolate. There is no wrong way to express the love you are.

Self love and manifestation

If you want to use self love as a tool to manifest your desires, you are basically still the person who thinks of lack and effort, and you see your desires as something outside of yourself that needs to be attracted. Self love is not a tool to manifest, but the fulfillment itself.

While knowing who you really are and feeling the love you are, you automatically have only the best thoughts about yourself. There is no effort to repeat positive affirmations, because there is no reason to affirm anything negative. It becomes the most natural thing to visualize and to daydream a wonderful life while assuming only the best about yourself and others. Any self-harming thoughts and actions comes from an unfavorable self-concept and is a result of a lack of understanding.

Instead of using self love as a tool, remind yourself, who you really are and let this feeling embrace your whole being. Then you will see everything is already here for you, it always was and always will be.

Living in the end and self love go hand in hand with each other.

Self love – Dealing with obstacles, resistance and the fear to harm others

With the understanding of who you really are, obstacles and resistance become meaningless. When creation is finished, there can’t be an obstacle to hinder you. There is only resistance, when you accept resistance to be true. You can torture yourself by thinking about blockages and failure, or you can choose to spend your time with love.

Many people are also afraid to harm others while living their desires. They fear to be selfish or break a Golden Rule. When there is nothing but abundance and love, you cannot harm others. To think the fulfillment of your desire can hurt another person, you disapprove of yourself and your desires – neither you nor others gain anything.

There is no force outside of yourself approving for you. You won’t help anyone if you suffer. Accept that your desires are meant to be. They came to you through God and the fulfillment is always the best that can happen to you and others – you don’t need to modify your wish. No one involved will experience a less good life, just because you want to live the best you can imagine. You create the limits, so choose to claim nothing but abundance, and never settle for less than what you want.

Live only the life you desire, there is absolutely no reason why you can’t have it.

About Author

Nikki is working as a graphic designer, she illustrates fantasy themed artworks. Some of her work can be found on book covers and her own books and graphic novel projects. Since she knows about Neville Goddard and his teachings about the Law, she wishes to combine art and Conscious Creation.


  • Lewis
    May 1, 2019 at 9:20 AM

    I learned, by finding Agnes, that self-love was a key aspect in the process of manifesting my Specific Person back into my life again.

    I’m finding it difficult to wrap my head around though and I do feel as though, right now (although it’s diminishing by the day), that I am using it as a tool to bring him back.

    I don’t want that…I want to ‘be love’ as you say. How would you recommend I do that? What are your techniques for doing so?

    • Nicole
      May 6, 2019 at 5:01 AM

      Self love brings your person back into you life, not because it is a tool to make things happen, but because it changes your inner state from lack to fulfillment.

      Whenever you catch yourself thinking you use any tool to bring him back to you, remember, it is already done. In all his work Neville tells you, whatever you want is already here for you. There is nothing more to do, but accepting this. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone, there is no need to make things happen or to become worthy. You are already worthy and you have always been.

      But while using a tool to make something happen, we are not assuming that we are already who we want to be because we still see our desires separated from ourselves.

      It is never about the tools or techniques you use, it is all about what you assume to be true for you.
      No matter how many self love meditations you do, as long as you don’t assume the love that you desire is already here for you, you still fall for the illusion of lack. As long as you are longing for something, you are not yet living in the end.

      You are already love. You have always been and you will always be.
      All the love you seek is within you. The only reason why you don’t feel it, is because you keep assuming the lack of love. Drop the assumption that there is no love.

      This is what I did. I dared to accept that all the love is already here for me, if only to feel it for a second. It felt so good that I never wanted to go back again.

      • Lewis
        June 24, 2019 at 8:04 AM

        Hey Nicole,

        I missed this – only stumbled upon it again by chance, today!

        I was still longing for my SP over the weekend as I was in the club where we met nearly three years ago on Saturday.

        This is all still really alien to me so I have one more question, regarding dropping the illusion of lack of love. How did you do that, did you just allow yourself to embody the assumption that you are already love, and that’s it? Is it as simple as that? I’m trying that as I write this and have to say, it feels that all I have to do?

        • Nicole
          July 1, 2019 at 8:49 AM

          Yes, Lewis, this is all you need to do. You need no reason to feel loved and adored. Isn’t it wonderful to always feel blessed whenever you want to?

  • Sarah
    May 14, 2019 at 3:38 PM

    Nicole, thank you so much for this post. It really does mean the world.

    I have just been coming to terms, within the last few weeks, how my entire life has been shaped and run on the belief that I am unloveable.

    I cannot stop grieving this realization, and will catch myself of guard with overwhelming, heaving sobs, desperately apologizing to myself for having lived like this. Allowing such toxic and abusive thoughts and beliefs to run my life.

    I guess I just need to hear from someone else that one day this grieving will end. I suppose the best amends I could ever make for myself is to step into the acceptance that all that love is here for me.

    • Nicole
      May 23, 2019 at 7:22 AM

      Sarah, your journey sounds familiar and all I can say is, everything is fine.
      You are safe, secure and loved, no matter what – this became my personal mantra.
      You have not lost anything, abundance is still endless for you.

      • Ceeb
        April 25, 2020 at 11:13 PM

        I cried reading Sarah’s comment, because I felt it so deeply. And I’ve spent years, maybe decades, trying to feel otherwise — reading books, taking seminars, hiring coaches, utilizing visualizations, meditating, listening to YouTube videos, seeking that feeling of oneness and wholeness. I’ve always felt so fundamentally separate and alienated, even though fictional representations of love and belonging make me weep, and I consider strangers across the world to be my neighbors and borders and tribes to be meaningless. I played all by myself as a child, and basically played all by myself throughout my long and somewhat tedious adult life, with almost no relationships…certainly nothing long-term. I’m used to solitude, and my ego at least is fairly equanimous with its own company, but I’m bone weary of the loneliness that’s been a fact of my life. Fortunately I never wanted children, but I fiercely desired many men and other experiences I never had materially so it’s really hard to believe this “everything you desire is already yours” business.

        I once thought of writing a novel where the protagonist awakens from a 20-year coma and realizes that she dreamt her entire happy life — her beloved husband and family don’t exist. She befriends a woman in a grief group who lost her husband and kids in an accident. I imagined it would be a sort of meditation on how they’re both in the same boat in the present moment — empty handed — the material reality of one woman’s lived life is no more existent than the coma woman’s lost dream. I guess this was supposed to comfort me somehow, philosophically…that even the people who get the life they want in the 3D have to lose it sometime, and that my fantasy is as good as your reality. It might be an interesting concept, but it’s not really a comfort.

  • Dreamon
    June 30, 2019 at 2:17 AM

    Nicole, can you explain how we incorporate the feeling of “whatever we want is already here”. I am having a hard time understanding, reading about living in the end and visualising from various sources.

    Thank you!

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  • Christine
    December 1, 2020 at 3:36 PM

    If self love is the key, which I believe it is – wouldn’t like, all my exes come running back to me when im really working on it and finding myself in that state for a long time? What my question is.. why would my sp come back if none of the other does? I struggle with letting go on focus on him and more on self love. But I fear if im not focusing on him, it will all be sort of a “general attraction”.. :/


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